Barge to Hell Vikings

Good evening, I have an important transmission from the Fortress of Metallic Trinkets (aka Channel 13's base of operations)

This is a message to all the sea-faring Legions. I am looking to create the Fellowship of the Barge. As some (I would say most) of you may know, Barge to Hell ( http://www.bargetohell.com ) is heading out this December, and I am looking for some Vikings to join me in this voyage. The original post of my request is located \m/ here \m/.

I will also leave a permanent "mini" post on the navigation side of the blogs page titled "Barge to Hell Companions".

Send me a message (AOLIM: talshiaragent930), email ( i6z6a6n@hotmail.com ), Facebook post/message (everyone has one, so no excuses, unless I blocked you, huh-huh, huh-huh, huh-huh!), carrier pigeon (can't make any assurances it will come back, Satan needs his sacrifices too ya know.).

So for those of you looking to join a Viking raiding party, this is your chance.

Many advance thanks for those interested \m/

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Brütal Legend 2 Petition

I know this is not a major update, since this weekend is an "off-time" for Channel 13, but the \m/ METAL \m/ still "Marches ör Dies". Whats gonna make it march this weekend? The Brütal Legend 2 petition. At the bottom corner of the page you will see it, and when you get a quick second or 2, click on the link so you may ask for a sequel (Kindly of course. If not, we'll do what Vikings do best, storm places and bring the "Metalwrath" to the unsuspecting monks. Except in this case it'll be the shores of the Double Fine offices and their staff. Of course, the ensuing pillaging will still play out, as I am hoping to snag a Full Throttle poster.).

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Dialogues of the Steel Jaws of Death: Niuvis Martin and her Paradise Portrait

Channel 13 is proud to announce “Dialogues of the Steel Jaws of Death”, our interview section of the blog, and what better way to kick off this series than by interviewing Niuvis Martin, the creator of a very kick ass work of art.

I6Z6A6N - Tell the audience a bit about yourself?

Niuvis - Born in Cuba, raised in Miami my whole life. I am multidisciplinary artist, both visually and musically inclined as well as a die hard Metal fan.

I6Z6A6N – Who and/or what got you into Metal and when did this happen?

Niuvis - I believe it all started when I moved from Kendall to Tamiami and changed schools in the spring of 2001. I was intrigued with the "rockers" at my middle school and was drawn to the culture thus felt a strong connection to the ideas/lifestyle/music. I sought out for myself some heavy underground bands of that nature. And later on I obviously progressed to the more secular realm and did my research on underground Metal. Then lo and behold, before I knew it, I was baptized in blood.

I6Z6A6N - What is the name of your art piece?

Niuvis - “Paradise”


I6Z6A6N - What was your inspiration for the project?

Niuvis – Metal music and the subculture along with religious art. It was moreover a direct compositional reference to Tintoretto’s’ “Paradise”.

I6Z6A6N - What materials were utilized to make this piece?

Niuvis – A PLETHORA OF CONCERT PHOTOS. Three 4x6 ft panels of Birch plywood, DASS transparency film and a plotter to print the images, DASS Supersauce, Photoshop, Gudy adhesive roll, Acrylic paint and Matte Medium.


I6Z6A6N - How long did it take to complete?

Niuvis - About 2 months.I6Z6A6N - How long have you been a Metal fan?

Niuvis – For about 12 years now.

I6Z6A6N - Did your past experiences as a Metal fan helped in any way contribute to your art piece?

Niuvis - They most definitely did! This piece has been my visual response to these 12 years of madness!


I6Z6A6N - Did any album (or albums) or musician (or musicians) inspired you during the process?

Niuvis – It was more of the culture itself, as a whole being part of my inspiration. Also my love and dedication to it played a major role. A few of my very good friends also helped me pave the way for my ideas to bloom such as Tim Creter and Jean Saiz. Many thanks to them.

I6Z6A6N – Aside from the music, what is the most interesting part of Metal music and its culture to you?

Niuvis – The best way I can describe it is the aspect of reality Metal and its conceptual origins bring to the table as opposed to mainstream music and their materialistic and egotistical point of view. Metal to me, is about a constant battle within ourselves and against the world. It’s about true freedom of self and the rejection of anything and anyone who tries to stop these freedoms from happening. It’s also about the sense of community that is created within this music subculture.

I6Z6A6N - Is there any unique way you have benefited from Metal?

Niuvis – I have benefited from Metal in the sense that it has helped me mature much quicker in life because you are constantly in this state of heavy thinking; pondering life/death and everything else around you, you become an observer of things, and from that mentality you tend to learn a lot quicker of the errors in man-kind thus try your best to not repeat them. And of course it has certainly shaped my artistic vision, helping me to focus on the things that are important to me, thus the creation of “Paradise”.

I6Z6A6N - What are your top “13” Metal albums of all time?

Niuvis - I will list them according to my preferences from the very beginnings of my dedication to the music up until recently, where my tastes have changed a bit:

1) Immortal - Sons of Northern Darkness
2) Blood Red Throne - Monument of Death
3) Death - Leprosy
4) Bathory - Hammerheart
5) Kyuss - Welcome to Sky Valley
6) Electric Wizard - Witchcult Today
7) Bolt Thrower - Mercenary
8) Benediction - The Dreams You Dread
9) Morbid Angel - Altars of Madness
10) Slugathor - Echoes from Beneath
11) Black Sabbath - Paranoid
12) Bongripper - Satan Worshipping Doom
13) Inquisition - Into the Infernal Regions of the Ancient Cult

The list can surely go on and on because I have so many favorites, but I will stop here with lucky number 13.

I6Z6A6N - When I saw your portrait debut a week ago, it definitely made a very good impression not only on myself, but others who managed to view it, both Metal fans and “Outlanders” (people not into Metal music) seemed to have responded positive to it. Do you feel this was your intent or did you have another impact in mind?

Niuvis – My intentions were to simply share my outlook on this subculture and the music as being a spiritual experience. I achieved this by transforming metal head fans and musicians alike into religious iconography. It was almost like a science experiment. I wanted to find a visual correlation between spirituality and Metal music in particular to then intertwine them as one in a unique way.


I6Z6A6N - Aside from the plebeian’s perspective, what were your friends and family’s reaction before it was released to the masses?

Niuvis – “WOW” and speechlessness were most of the reactions. They couldn’t believe their eyes. Most people were truly amazed and proud of what I had accomplished after a long hard struggle of finding my way to the top.


I6Z6A6N - Which genre of Metal is the one that strikes the chord of steel in you?

Niuvis – It is very difficult to place a distinction between just ONE because ALL have had a significant impact throughout the years therefore I will mention the few that I am most passionate about: Death, Black, Doom, and Stoner/Sludge.

I6Z6A6N - Now, to ask a controversial question, of all the forms of Metal that exists, which is the one you detest?

Niuvis – I love all Metal genres except “nu-metal”, or “metal-core”, because we all know it’s not the real deal and has been diluted for youngsters who don’t know any better.

I6Z6A6N – Do you have any plans in the future for additional art works to be added to your portfolio?

Niuvis – I plan to continue using my photographs from concerts and the subjects within them to create a transcendental visual phenomenon and thus push the idea of spirituality within metal music further and see where it takes me. This is an on-going body of work in which I do not intend to stop anytime soon.


I6Z6A6N – That's all the questions I have, any final words before we part into our Metal lives?

Niuvis – Stay true and continue to tread along the path you have created for yourselves. No matter how many distractions have bombarded, trying to keep you off track or sufferings you have endured to pull you under, the fact that you are still alive and breathing should be an indication to continue doing the things you are most passionate about. No matter what negativity comes your way, always remember, YOU are in charge of your life; no one else is, so make the best of it while we are still here on this earth, for the unknown parts in our universe lurk and yearn for your soul.


I6Z6A6N – Many thanks HEAVY thanks for your time and for the portrait \m/

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Sentry Bullet 9mm Earbuds

Firearms. Quite possibly mankind's most Metal (both literally and figuratively) creation to date. How many songs in the world of Heavy Metal have been attributed by this one creation? From the American Revolution, to the American Civil War, to World War I and World War II, to the Vietnam War, firearms have been a staple of the creation of Metal music since the crystallization period of our audio "Onslaught".

Now comes the obvious question to ask. What is a firearms diet? Answer: Bullets. Never has there been a symbol synonymous with firearms like bullets. Think about it for one minute. Without bullets, a firearm is only an expensive club to wield at an attacker (not to say it hasn't been utilized in such a manner as many battles and wars were won using the rifle as a club and at times, a spear).

We now take a look at another way of hearing our beloved music in quite possibly the most symbolic gesture we can ever ask for. Introducing the Sentry Bullet 9mm Earbuds.


Now, and to have a fanboy moment, when I saw these, I couldn't believe my eyes. I needed to do a double-take just to be certain I was seeing what I was seeing, and low and behold, there they were, bullet earbuds for your music listening pleasure. To say this is Metal would be like saying chainsaws/wolves/Harley Davidsons are Metal, which is to state the obvious.


The caliber they are using to make these earbuds is the 9mm. Not the biggest bullet hole you'll encounter, but will do the job just right.


In case your wondering what the message in the beneath box says, here it is in blog clarity that my cheap lil' 1.3 mega pixel camera couldn't deliver:

"BULLET DIGITAL IN-EAR BUDS ARE DESIGNED TO THE SAME DIMENSIONS AS A 9MM BULLET CASING. ALL METAL DESIGN MEANS THEY ARE TOUGH, RUGGED & SOUND AMAZING WITH SWEET CRISP TREBLE AND RICH, DEEP SOUNDING BASS. THEY FIT IN YOUR EAR WHICH REDUCES UNWANTED NOISE. EXTRA EARPADS ARE INCLUDED FOR A CUSTOMIZED FIT".

More on this commentary from the manufacturer later on in the post.


The packaging of these earbuds really goes a distance to show that they look like 9mm bullets, and as a gun nut myself, I agree with that assessment.


Of course if your camouflage emblazoned package has the military feel, can't have it without the ultimate symbol of the muscle of said fighting force: The chevrons.


One thing that gives these earbuds a distinct advantage over the others offered in the market is the carry pouch that comes included with the package. This definitely helps in the protection of your audio investment.


Now it is time for the obligatory close up of the earbuds. Please note I tried doing the whole gun magazine fancy pictures routine with these, but my cell camera can only go so far.


As for the sound, I'll give them the crisp part as it does come in very clear, but the bass is something they need to work on.


They had these in black and silver, but decided on the brass colored as the majority of bullets come in this very well known color.


The best part about these earbuds is the amount of detail to make them look like actual bullets that they even made the material out of METAL (and not the music kind either).


Now here is a visual of how the ear plugs look when utilized properly. Note that some shooters have done this technique with REAL BULLETS due to the following reasons:

1) To test the theory of using bullets as ear protection at the range (not that any law abiding range would allow this).
2) The shooter forgot their ear protection and as a result, must go with what they got. Note this is not a commando way of handling ear protection.
3) The shooter is just a lazy bastard to walk to their car to get their ear protection.

NOTE: OBLIGATORY METAL PSA (Public Service Announcement). Do not ever attempt to place REAL bullets in your ears as you may encounter that once in a trillion chance where the round may discharge accidentally even if it is not loaded in a gun, and yes, I am being dead serious.


Talk about shooting up a lethal dose of music right into your ear.


Now here's the catch why this post even exists. The last earbuds I bought for my Ipod are now officially lost and as a result, I needed new ones. It seems I forgot to cover another potential problem a Metal fan may encounter with headphones, and that is the art of losing them.

To say this was a Metal journey the likes of which have not been seen since returning the One Ring to the lava pits of Mount Doom is a clear homage to one of the most Metal tales ever told.

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Skylanders Adventure Pack Darklight Crypt

There comes a time when you find something that was never meant to to be Metal that somehow finds its way to our Holy Land with an offering that definitely represents our culture best.

Spyro is a videogame that is NOT Metal as it involves a cartoonish looking dragon with some storyline of a no-goodnik doing something bad and it is up to Spyro and his buddies to stop said no-goodnik and blah, blah, blah, blah (you get the idea of how irrelevant this has to do with Metal music and it's culture).

So why are we talking about a video-game that has nothing to do with Metal? Because one of the characters happens to be an excellent representative of our culture in a place where our music has no business being in the first place.

Introducing Ghost Roaster and his Darklight Crypt set.


At first glance of this set, I thought this was some kind of action figure set for fans of the series to collect, but after further review, there's more to this than what is being let on... at least to those who don't know what the whole Spyro and his blah blah adventure is.

Here we have a good look at Ghost Roaster. A little bit of a back ground story as his credentials of being Metal are in order. Please note the following was taken from the Spyro Wikia section of Ghost Roaster:

"There was a time when Ghost Roaster was neither a ghost nor a roaster. Instead he was a chef living in a village high in the mountains. One day, while clipping wool from a sheep to use in a recipe, he accidentally fell into the Valley of the Undead and transformed into a ghost eating ghoul! After eating an entire spectral village, its Ethereal Ruler chained Ghost Roaster to a spiked ball as punishment. Its rattle can be heard as he wanders the night, warning nearby spirits. When Master Eon eventually heard of his predicament, he figured even a ghost eater could be useful. So he made Ghost Roaster a Skylander... after he promised to eat only evil ghosts."

So as you see it seems Ghost Roaster has the "Grave Digger" touch to his character.


The best part of this set is the crypt as it bears a menacing looking skull with tethered black wings. If I ever make it to a cartoon fantasy land and die there, I want this to be my grave.


Here we have some additional items the Ghost Roaster utilizes in the game.


As mentioned earlier, this is more than a trinket set for those who worship Ghost Roaster as it is a play set that is interactive with the video game by releasing the Ghost Roaster portion of the game. For somebody like me who is a product of the 80's, this reminds me of Captain Power and the Soldiers of the Future, except this set most likely works better than the Captain Power action figures of yesterday.


Of course, if you don't have the goods for the set to be interactive with the game, you can always apply the code and get to the Ghost Roasters chapter of the game.


Overall, this set is Metal if you are looking for a cute side of Metal that isn't weakening the music at all. If anything, Ghost Roaster should have his own TV show.

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