Ed Force Ones Black Metal Sister Plane

Okay, this is the time where Metal fans are gonna make the impact we are all known for making.

Not since the time Richard Christy was voted to be Stuttering John's replacement on The Howard Stern Show has there been an opportunity for the Legions to vote one of our own into the limelight, and this time it is Black Metal's late legend Øystein Aarseth, aka Euronymous, with his mug emblazoned on one of Norwegian Air Shuttles plane.

Click here to vote. It is in Norwegian, but really, the only name you need to know is Øystein Aarseth.

Get to it and let's make history happen again.

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Nemesis Skull and Iron Cross Watch

"Time, what is time" as the great Blind Guardian once said, is something that we all only know in it's current state, moving forward and it's past, as in events that happened from a second ago to the millions and billions of years of the existence "we" know. Of course, if you have a souped up Delorean that does a special magic trick when reaching 88 miles an hour, than the time we know would be a waste of linear understanding.

For Metal fans, the only time we need to know is when the gig/Metal festival/party/renaissance festival/horror-sci fi convention/etc. starts, and this is where the fine folks at Nemesis Watches bring you their goods.


They have many to choose from, but as you can tell by the blog you are currently on, I decided to go with the most Metal offering in their armament, the Skull dial face and the Iron Cross band.


Mind you, this is not the way they originally offer it, as they have a equally kickass skull band that normally goes with this watch, but being the awesome folks that the Nemesis Watches staff members are, I decided on the Iron Cross band as anybody who knows me knows that the Skull and the Iron Cross are my 2 call signs, and mixing them together is like mixing 1 part Rumple Minze Schnapps, 1 part Yukon Jack, a splash of Blue Curacao all in a ice strainer with ice, shake it up, and serve and before you know it, you got the Screaming Blue Viking, a tasty beverage for the elite. And for the record, you must scream "VALHALLA" before consuming the Titanic drink of greatness.


The watch is extremely comfortable to wear, and the tone it exhibits is a HEAVY dose of Metal both literally and figuratively.


A watch like this would go perfect with Metal work shirts or even certain dress shirts that have the Metal factor "Running Wild".

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Driven by Refresh Backstage Passes Car Freshener

A Metal fans car can sometimes have objectionable odors emanating from it. From the stained nacho cheese dip molding from the Friday night joyride of years past, to the aroma known as "420", to the vomit from taking in too many cans of Budweiser (and this is not due to the volume of alcohol, we can handle the gallons, but rather due to drinking the wrong kind of alcohol.), the Metalheads car smell is one that is unwelcoming.

Every once in a while, we somehow-someway manage to find a moment to clean our car, and to match the ferocity of our music and it's culture, we now have the perfect item to enhance the experience of a clean car by placing the very last object every single car has when the job is complete. The car freshener.

Presenting Driven by Refresh Backstage Passes. A Metal way to say to the world that your car doesn't smell like crap.


They have a slew of other car fresheners, but today we focus on the most Metal of the batch. The 2 scents in question are Titanium Rain and Black Out, and if there ever was a way to make smelling good very Metal, here they are.

First up is Titanium Rain. I ask, if there ever was a planet where Metal is the law of nature, the rain would look like the aforementioned name of the scent.


The back of the package really exudes a Metal fans lifestyle, "Loud and Proud".


If I was to pick between the 2, I would say the scent Black Out is the more Metal of the 2. The reason? Black and gray with a pissed of skull looking right at you/your girlfriend on the passenger side seat/the driver in the next lane picking his nose/etc. Mind you, there is nothing wrong or less Metal with Titanium Rain, it is just like picking between the albums Painkiller and Screaming for Vengeance, 2 very awesome albums but if one had to be chosen, it would be Painkiller just because it is Priest at their HEAVIEST!6!6!6!


Now, it is time for the unveiling. First up Titanium Rain.


Here is Titanium Rain, adding to my cars Metal atmosphere (also known as the cassette adapter connected to my Ipod).


Next is Titanium Rains more evil twin brother, Black Out.


One of the best parts these car fresheners have is that they look like backstage passes that are issued to the few (or those who buy VIP passes and get to meet & greet their "Guitar Hero" for all of 15 minutes that is allowed in such engagements).


Here it is, scaring the crap out of my date. Notice she is not even in the car anymore.


To prove that these car fresheners look like backstage passes, I have made the executive decision to wear one at the expense of my ego.


Many HEAVY THANKS to Alfredo "the coffee slinger recorded on VHS" for taking this last minute pic on one of my many last minute goofball impulses I have every once in a minute or so.

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Beavis and Butt-head Sleepwear Collection

I want to mention something very important before proceeding to tonight's post. I want to say thank you to everybody for being patient with me while I was trying to get back to the norm of things as being without a car for well over a month has really hindered my ability to do much with Channel 13 and Wackentrek. My weekends were filled with car shopping that took a lot of time and taking public transportation to get around as well as tending to a school project did not help my case one bit. Now that I have a car, things should be getting back to normal. To reward you for your patience, here are 3 new posts for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy it \m/

Okay everybody, say it together now: "Huh-huh, huh-huh, huh-huh", "Heh-heh, heh-heh, heh-heh". With these words, 2 ancient and wise beings came to be in a saga that very few tales can rival, and that saga is the Beavis and Butt-head TV show.

In the world of Heavy Metal, never has there been 2 individuals who approached the music with such passion and "to the point" accuracy, and with words such as "this rules" or "this sucks", their message could not be misconstrued on how awesome or shitty something/everything is.

When the TV show had it's first run, little did anybody knew at the time how vital and important the show would be to the decade known as the 90's, when all that was Metal was at its lowest point, as well as defining that decades few good contributions to the world.

When the show ceased to exist in the late 90's with the aptly titled "Beavis and Butt-head Are Dead", came the end of a great era of television and one of the last "good" shows Mtv has ever delivered to the world. And for those of you who say Headbangers Ball was an excellent show, all I have to say "That sucks, huh-huh. huh-huh".

Zoom forward 2011, Beavis and Butt-head are now on a ultimate comeback of the likes of which that has not been seen since the release of Iron Maidens Brave New World album and Fear Factory's Archetype album. And with their recaptured popularity comes the inevitable schwag everyone wants to sell.

Thanks to Walmart and Target, we have the Beavis and Butt-head Sleepwear Collection, and if I made it sound like something from a Macy's catalog, than you are correct.


First item up on this fashion show is the Beavis and Butt-head "Uhhh...Mustaches Rule!" shirt. Picked it up at Target on a goofball impulse during one of my escapades for Frito Pies, this shirt pays an unintentional homage to the Pringles chip guy.


Next up is the Beavis and Butt-head polyester lounge pants. The pants look like one those New York style block painting with the faces on them, making it the most artsy item of the lot we have here.


One thing about these pants is they don't skip on the details when it comes to all the space they used to make these pants happen.

On a value note, I managed to pick up these pants at Target on clearance at the most epical price of $5.08 (from $16.99). If there ever was a sale that epitomized METAL bargains, this is it.


Coming down the runway, we have the Nachos Rule! lounge pants, paying homage to one of the Metalheads choice snack. Managed to snag these at Walmart while looking for said snack.


A side note, seems the duo went to the Metalheads Mission Festival and forgot the sun lotion, but at least are proud enough not to let a bad sun tan stop 'em from headbanging \m/


Like with the aforementioned artsy lounge pants, these were no exception on the details.


The following is what you call the "heavy artillery" of this line of sleepwear, as we are now entering a whole new level of Metal greatness with the "BREAKIN THE LAW!" lounge pants. Note, and for those who don't know, the chant "BREAKIN THE LAW!" is more than just a Beavis and Butt-head slogan, it's a Metal chant that has served the Legions for many years.


Look, let me come clean, it's the little "Beavis and Butt-head" tag that has been getting my attention with these lounge pants I have been writing about for the last hour or so, which is a very Metal tag.


The following boxer shorts is what we call "The Ultimate Tribute" to Heavy Metals 2 wise men, as these boxer shorts take one of the most memorable scenes from this great cartoon and immortalized it as fashion under the "Denim and Leather". Introducing the Beavis and Butt-head allover boxer shorts.


As with the aforementioned tags, this garment takes it to volume 11 by making it bigger and smack in the middle, where it belongs.


And here we have a pricing tag which makes for a perfect cubicle mini poster. It's called making the most out of little or nothing.


Now, you ask, how much more Metal can these shorts be? When you have the iconic Beavis and Butt-head "face off" on your ass, this piece of fabric is also worthy of the Metal Gods themselves.


For those who know where we are going next with this fashion show, I introduce to you the most Metal Beavis and Butt-head shirt ever to grace this mortal realm. Introducing the "BREAKIN THE LAW" shirt, with the Iron Maiden font type emblazoned to cover this chant in it's steel glory.


The interesting part is that this is the only shirt from Walmart any self respecting Metal fan will wear at a concert.

I feel the best way to end this is to have a sing along to one of Heavy Metals most influential songs, "Breaking the Law". All together now:

There I was completely wasting, out of work and down
all inside it's so frustrating as I drift from town to town
feel as though nobody cares if I live or die
so I might as well begin to put some action in my life

Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law

So much for the golden future, I can't even start
I've had every promise broken, there's anger in my heart
you don't know what it's like, you don't have a clue
if you did you'd find yourselves doing the same thing too

Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law

You don't know what it's like.....

Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law......

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Skull Ash Trays

As I will always say before and always, travel is a natural trait amongst Metalheads. Think about it for a minute, the very first Metalheads, the Vikings, were known for being long distance voyagers, but why? For starters, they were looking for things, like food, clothing, jewelry and knickknacks. The modern Metalhead is not very different than their ancient Scandinavian predecessors, as we travel to look for foods we typically don't eat (Rock N Roll Ribs, Heavy Burger), clothing (The many shops and stores in Europe and their festivals), jewelry (let's be frank, the aforementioned stores have it) and knickknacks (Let's just go with the Haribo candy we typically don't find in the USA. I know, this should go under food, but still).

Todays find takes us to the recent Iced Earth 2012 Florida Tour I and some awesome friends embarked on. Introducing the Skull Ash Trays.


While filling up on some gas at a local Broward county Circle K, my travel buddy Alex Flores (of Sinistre Division) brought to my attention this porcelain of steel greatness, and needless to say, it definitely is a kick ass way of putting down your cigarettes while engaging in a conversation about Metal albums and hot chicks.


My personal favorite of the batch would be the square one with the Black Skull Iron Cross, as aside from one of my favorite symbols being emblazed on it, it also has black skull with wings on it.


I'm not a smoker at all, but I will be the first to admit that if I was, I'd definitely pick up one of these and have those conversations about Metal albums and hot chicks. Definitely recommended.

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