Before I begin, a bit of a disclaimer about this post. Todays discovery came about by "accident". Here's how the story goes. It's Friday (literally yesterday from this post), just got out of work, and I ordered some pizzas via the internet (what provoked this was a bargain of a deal I received in my personal email. 50% off my entire order. Something like this usually inspires people to reach for their wallets and give the cash for said item(s) in question). What's more interesting is that after consuming a good chunk of the pies (with little leftover for everyone else \m/ ), I realized Domino's had a Metal way of tracking your order.
Before the internet age, you would either A) Go to the pizza restaurant and place your order and wait a good 20 - 25 minutes (this was back in the day when ovens needed a lot of time to bake the pizza, not like todays ovens that can get the job done faster), or B) The more popular choice was to phone in (Harry Sachz style) your order for carryout or the more popular (and more expensive) choice of delivery. These 2 choices lacked one thing the internet age brought... the tracking of your order. This is what you call the backstage access to the pizza parlor, minus the glitz and glam.
Channel 13 introduces you to Domino's Pizza Hair Metal theme Order Tracker.
Thankfully, when Domino's was promoting this feature, they actually kept the thumb in, instead of the usual error of the thumb sticking out to say I love you. Metal is not love, it is W6A6R6!
My only gripe with this feature is that they called it Hair Metal. While Hair Metal is for all intents and purposes Metal (and to prove my point, I can take any drugged out, alcoholic musicians from the Hair Metal era and they can play their instrument a hell of a lot better than their rap wiggin' counterpart of the late 90's/early 2000's), it definitely could've been better had they dropped the word "Hair" and ran with the shortened name of "Metal".
The feature definitely goes after the stereotype not only of the aforementioned sub-genre of Metal, but traditional Metal as well with the Iron Maiden font, the knobs at the most Metal volume setting ("11" for those of you on the outside), the amp design of the tracker, as well as the constant borderline bellowing/screeching of the status of your order whenever it hits the part that is complete, and even the lightning bolts and pyros add to this tracker themes Metalness.
Credit: TFHDC
Next time you want to order some pizza and want to burn the time between the "order" button and the delivery guy/gal arriving at your doorstep, give Domino's Pizza Hair Metal theme Order Tracker a shot and behold the glory that is Metal, pizza order style \m/
\m/
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