Fisher Price Tough Trike Harley Davidson Edition

The biker culture. As Deena Weinsteins book “Heavy Metal: The Music and Its Culture” indicated, half of Metals fashion and attitude comes from Harley riding maniacs, and if you take a look at our patch & pin infested vests and our anti-social behavior, the evidence is crystal clear. The other half is from hippies (The fact we can listen to Metal for hours straight without the need of refueling, the long hair, and the choice of drug amongst Metal fans is weed (Side note, I know this is debatable, but if you have gone to plenty of Metal shows, you‘ll know exactly what I am talking about.), we can see how our society came to be.

Todays post is about our future, the Children of Metal. While kids may be too young to ride a full size motorcycle, we can definitely inject that feeling at a very early age without resorting to needles with the Fisher Price Tough Trike Harley Davidson Edition.


The recommended age for this trike is for kids between 2 to 5 years old, so you can definitely get a good solid 3 years out of it before graduating them into regular bicycles.

The trike features some HEAVY tires and even a storage area.


The best part about this trike is that it looks very Metal, and definitely grabbed everyones attention with the Harley orange and black call sign emblazoned all over it.

The bad part, you have to assemble it, but it’s not as bad as it seems. If anything, you’ll feel like you’re re-enacting the scene from Brütal Legend when Eddie builds the Killmasters Trike. Talk about a Metal inspiration for a build.


On second thought, I take it back. The march to a Metal Christmas begins. Here are the parts.

Than there’s the manual, nothing too complicated, but than again, assembly required.

The process begins by attaching the seat to the body of the trike.

Place the rear tires to the body. A side note, this was the toughest part of the whole endeavor.

Next was inputting the pedal hubs on the front tire.

Than connecting the fork with the front tire.

After completing the front part of the trike, it came time to attach it to the body and place the handlebars.

Finally, it was sticker time.

So your wondering, with all the goods I buy for this blog, what could a man 25 years too old for a Tough Trike can do with an awesome gift of the Metal Gods? Give it to his nephew as a Christmas present.

Since this is a very Metal gift to give to a very awesome kid, I needed a very Metal Christmas gift wrap. Since I didn’t have any skull/iron cross/pentagram gift wrap, I had to go with the next best option, the Wacken Open Air Beach Towel I procured from my previous trip to drape the gift.

I will say that when the blanket was lifted and the Tough Trike was unveiled, he was as happy as one can be and looks like it was the best gift he got for this Christmas.
So what was the finally tally to bring a Metal Christmas to a very lucky nephew, $19.99 plus taxes.
Looking back, I am glad I got this for my nephew, as it definitely made my holidays and added to a very Metal Christmas.
Merry Christmas and a Happy and HEAVY New Year everyone!6!6!6!

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Wychwood Brewery Hobgoblin

Hobgoblins, characters of folklore that definitely belong on the Black Metal/Folk Metal/Pagan Metal side of our HEAVY spectrum. The fact that it belongs in Heavy Metal is a tale told by many bands for many decades.

Today, we take a look at a beverage that pays homage to the creature from the woods. Introducing Wychwood Brewery Hobgoblin.


The companies name came about due to it’s location in Southern England near the Wychwood forest, which only reinforces the evidence of this beverage worthiness in the halls of Metal as Legions are known for hanging around woods and forests to act like trolls (!6!6!6!).


The hobgoblin is on the bottle looking at you saying “stop looking at me or I’ll hack you up with my axe”. That’s a very Folk Metal way of dealing with staring imbeciles.


The only size available was a pint of the product, and at 5.2% of alcohol content, it definitely had a tingle to it’s buzz.


The brew is a Dark English Ale, which means it’s going to taste just as it sounds.


Speaking of taste, it definitely has a dirty flavoring, but not the kind that will leave you sick, but sticks to your tongue and in a good way.


The smell was very weird, but than again some beers are known to smell funky and still taste good.

On a final note, it seems the Wychwood brewery has had some Rock related promotions with Gibson and Marshall and handing out prizes, so there you go as far as credentials are concerned.

Overall, great beer to change the gears of alcohol consumption one would face in the fridge. Definitely suggested to the worthy known of Metalheads.

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Skull Shakers

Salt and pepper, 2 basic spices every household needs. From the dawn of modern culinary applications, spices are an essential necessity if you want to cook a meal properly, or at least to mace a injection of taste to the meal.


Today we look at dispensers of the aforementioned common spices which allows one to sprinkle on French fries in a very Metal way. Of course, the next pic shows how boring it is to throw some salt on the fries with a plain jane shaker. Notice how unMetal this course of action, with it's lack of life, excitement, and Heavy Metal greatness.


Once again, thanks to Targets seasonal section during the Halloween era of 2011, we have the Skull Shakers, and as you can tell from the pics, these are very awesome tabletop decorations that double as the salt and peppers launch base.


They had these in 2 colors, black and silver (Heavy Metals colors \m/), and I managed to pick up the black ones since they had a very Metal appeal to it. Think about it, dark skulls, meaning, the individual must have been evil down to the bone.


When you buy shakers, it seems the golden rule of thumb is to procure them in 2’s since anyone who only has one spice and not the other is either nuts, or has a misfired piston in their noggin.


To load these shakers with said condiments, you have to go beneath them and find the bunghole.


These salt shakers are a very Metal manner to spice up some fries \m/

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Skull Flask

The flask, every alcoholics choice of spirit portability. This is a story of a container that has allowed people to carry their choice of venom with discretion since the 18th century. There have been plenty of flasks that existed before the 18th century, but todays post is the modern one everyone has come to know and love.

As Metal fans, we too like to carry our poison in discreet and unnoticeable ways, especially at concerts (Unless venue security does the whole cavity search pat down, than your screwed.). But not any normal flask will do the job, because as Metal Legions, we command a greater flask to do the job, and that’s where Targets Halloween section comes into the picture. Introducing the Skull Flask.


This flask may look like any other flask, but what makes it Metal is the Skull scarred into the flask, giving that edge for the Legions to carry this knowing full well that the Nectar of the Metal Gods now has a container worthy of the Gods themselves.

As with any modern flask, it has a hinge connected to the cap to prevent it from being lost, since intoxicated people and Legions are known for losing small items during these episodes.


At the price of $9.99 (As crazy Presidential candidate Michelle Bachman said about Herman Cains plan, it’s 666 upside down.), this is definitely a value any Legion can afford. Highly suggested, if you can smuggle it in the venue.

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